Imagine, a world of shit.

Just screamed at my roomate's dog for shitting in my room. I've lost track of how many times it's done this. Dog has a grudge against me, that's why it keeps doing this. The roomate who owns this dog is getting evicted at the end of this month. She's planning on throwing a "Rager" on her last day here. Why? To piss me off. She told my other roomate this, who then told me.

I feel kinda bad. I took out a lot of anger on the dog just now, and it's hiding at the back door of the house, and hasn't moved since. It's probably scared shitless of me now, and there's two feelings here: satisfaction, and sadness. I'm sorry for the emotions the dog is feeling now. I've been in it's place before. Scared. Not knowing where to go. Feeling alone and unwanted, hated, rejected. Threatened.

It sucks to feel that way. But it has got to stop being such a little shit. I'm glad it's here for only a couple more weeks. And I know that I've taken some of my frustration for it's owner out on the dog itself, which is unfair. It's an animal, it doesn't know what it's owner has done wrong. But it hopefully understands that shitting in my room is going to have serious consequences from now on.


And now for the roomate. I feel the most ready to confront her now about her plan, however she is not here. And unfortunately, like most things, this feeling of assertiveness will fade. I may go back to just completely ignoring her. But that would be unwise. Should I talk to her about it, I can at least get a better idea of how likely it is that she will do it, and potentially talk her out of it.

What else can I do? Unfortunately, not a God damn thing. I called the police already, and they said that they can only act if she does something. I told my landlord, and he said that he's keeping an eye on the house (he lives nextdoor), and if he needs to, he'll escort her out.

What do I really want to do? I want to threaten her. I want to come home just as this "Rager" is beginning, and open a can of whoop ass on anyone willing to take it. Unfortunately, I will be in a world of shit if I do that. So I have to bite my tongue and keep myself composed, even if I come home to a world of shit.



I almost never get to show that side of me. My Anger Genie. It feels empowering to let it out. My two best friends were here to witness it. And after I was done yelling, the house was dead silent. My voice was hoarse, my hands were shaking with adrenaline. I felt a cocktail of emotions. When the adrenaline passed, my head was very clear and oriented. I felt less fragmented, more confident, and more sure of myself and my actions. As with all feelings though, this one will fade.